All tags

^ash... You will address me by my proper title, you little bollocks!
^ash... For a taste of your whiskey, I'll give you some advice.
^ash... Fortunately, thanks to computer savvy alcoholics there's an app for that.
^ash... "when you let an electrical engineer design a programming language"
^ash... All ten are out and the last two were ducks...
^ash... I believe when the robots rise up, ATMs will lead the charge.
^ash... observe that two thoughts could be found to contain the same discovery.
^ash... I don't believe in a lot of things, but I do believe in duct tape.
^ash... something no Englishman should forget and no Irishman should remember.
^ash... "I am trying to use reason and intelligence," said the strange new mongoose.
^ash... Let's see how you feel after three years of living in the seventies.
^ash... If you mean time-traveling bunnies -- then yes.
^ash... We will stick it with glue, glue, glue...
^ash... because we are English that we're standing up for our right to be Burgundian
^ash... I never really doubted you, it was just my silly common sense.
^ash... Let's see what happens when we take away the puppy.
^ash... unless you have a rudder and a lot of sails hidden in that bodice...
^ash... Is this the gentleman who ruined the buffet at the Harrow club this morning?
^ash... His spirit is gone but his stench remains.
^ash... The spark of his life is smothered in shite.
^ash... Well if he is it's a very good disguise.
^ash... No sir, as we rehearsed: poetry first, sausage later.
^ash... I didn't realise this country used "disappear" as a transitive verb.
^ash... we have a superabundance of messengers, errand boys, and things of that kind
^ash... Kept a shine on the bar with the sleeves of our coats.
^ash... somewhat larger than the US
^ash... How oft doth man, by care oppressed / Find in an inn a place of rest.
^ash... Out of an orange colored, purple striped, pretty green polka-dot sky
^ash... Flash, bam, alakazam, out of an orange colored sky
^mary... I backed a horse today at 20 to 1. It came in at twenty past four.
^mary... I'm on a whisky diet; I've lost three days already.
^mary... I had a ploughman's lunch the other day; he wasn't half mad.
^mary... Man walks into a bar. Didn't half hurt. It was an iron bar.
^mary... I slept like a log last night; I woke up in the fireplace.
^ash... like saying using tonic water as an additive reduces our demand for gin.
^ash... I hate this issue. It's like walking around town holding a sick chicken.
^ash... Star X, spectral class G0, 4 planets plus debris.
^ash... "I think this would be a good time for a beer." [fdr]
^ash... lucky Einstein didn't have to fill one out or God knows what e would equal.
^ash... but you gave him the straw and then drove over him with a tank
^ash... It's my Catholicism, Toby; it works for me.
^ash... I do say potato, and so does everybody else I know.
^ash... I think you're putting too much faith in the magical powers of a new shirt.
^ash... When we're done with those two, we'll go on to the other ninety-eight.
^ash... Well, maybe they don't, and they also can't count.
^ash... My question is in 22 parts and might take quite a while.
^ash... Morris dancing: least stealthy of the world's martial arts.
^dwm... Blasphemy is a victimless crime.
^ash... And I knew right then, I'd be takin' a whirl
^ash... And I lost my heart to a Galway girl
^ash... So I took her hand and I gave her a twirl
^ash... If her hair was black and her eyes were blue
^ash... And I ask you now, tell me what would you do
^ash... Well, I took a stroll on the old long walk / Of a day I-ayI-ay
^ash... People say in Boston even beans do it.
^ash... A load of Tottenham, that is. A steaming pile of Hotspur.
^ash... The chair recognizes ... Senator Smith.
^ash... You're halfway decent. You don't belong here.
^ash... They're changing it from Ocean Grey to Military Grey.
^ash... Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.
^dwm... "Anyone who thinks the LHC will destroy the world is a twat."
^dwm... "Apple has got this gift of extremely time bound ephemeral futurism."
^dwm... Nobody likes a smartass, except when they really need tech support.
^dwm... Don't take life too seriously. You'll never make it out alive, anyway.
^dwm... "Once the Internet knows something, it never forgets!" -- Cory Doctorow
^dwm... "'Stringent guidelines' is an oxymoron." -- Richard Lamont
^ash... Your Honor, I'd like that last remark stricken from the record.
^dwm... Repographics: Being forced to forfeit image designs borrowed from elsewhere.
^ash... because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
^ash... those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
^dwm... Knowledge Management: If you have to ask what it is, you're doing it wrong.
^ash... Cattle mutilations are up.
^ash... We are the United States government, we don't do that sort of thing.
^ash... You'll never waitress in Torquay again.
^ash... No, no... I won't have that. There's a place in Eastbourne.
^ash... Well, I think we just ran out of Waldorfs.
^dwm... "I am not a number, I am an alphanumeric string!"
^ash... You won't have a name when you fly the big aeroplane.
^dwm... The wonders of modern technology.
^dwm... "Gene Police! You! Out of the pool, now!"
^dwm... Congratulations, you're the first human to fail the Turing test.
^ash... Think Blade Runner meets Field of Dreams.
^dwm... He who commits last, fixes the conflict.
^dwm... It's not exactly rocket surgery.
^dwm... They never do things that way in the NASA control room.
^dwm... Check, check, check, che- oh, shit.
^dwm... Back off man. I'm a scientist.
^dwm... I'm fuzzy on the whole good/bad thing. What do you mean "bad"?
^dwm... There's something very important I forgot to tell you.
^dwm... What does God need with a starship?
^dwm... Speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out.
^dwm... In fact, quitting at this point is a perfectly reasonable response.
^ash... God doesn't work for the BBC any more; he left when Noel Edmonds joined.
^ash... Nation shall speak ratings unto nation.
^dwm... "Remember, dose MP3s, dey bad for you health!" -- "Accelerando"
^dwm... "If human behavior was logical, there would be no gambling, hmm?" -- Stross
^dwm... "Put Smarties tubes on cats legs, make them walk like a robot."
^dwm... 1 - Insert foot in mouth. 2 - Aim at foot. 3 - Fire.
^dwm... The probability of a second disk failing during a RAID rebuild approaches 1.
^ash... It's just navels all the way down.
^dwm... Excuse me, but _real_ programmers use butterflies. [http://xkcd.com/378/]
^ash... Oh yeah, good ol' C-x M-c M-butterfly ... [http://xkcd.com/378/]
^dwm... /* elbitapmoc sdrawkcab XXX */
^dwm... "Quick, operator, give me the number for 911!"
^ash... Says Joe "What they can never kill, went on to organize..."
^ash... "Takes more than guns to kill a man" / Says Joe, "I didn't die".
^ash... Says I, "But Joe, you're ten years dead" / "I never died" said he.
^dwm... Any sufficiently advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice.
^ash... I said, "Ma'am, I am tonight".
^ash... How can you think with your shoes on?
^ash... Only when it was funny.
^ash... It's just not evenly distributed yet.
^dwm... Yes, but it's called the future so get used to it.
^ash... But I laugh and eat well and grow strong.
^dwm... You should always reserve the right to change your mind.
^dwm... That's very deep and obvious, but it's not actually true.
^dwm... On the internet, nobody can hear you being subtle.
^dwm... Occam's Razor:The simplest explanation is almost always somebody screwed up.
^dwm... "When in doubt, tell the truth." -- Mark Twain
^dwm... Let me put it this way: today is going to be a learning experience.
^dwm... Tomorrow has been cancelled owing to a lack of interest.
^dwm... Cheer up! Things are getting worse at a slower rate.
^dwm... Phill Jupitus said it, so it *must* be true!
^dwm... "To a lion, you're just a conveniently packaged bag of protein."
^dwm... "I tell people that if it's in the news, don't worry about it."
^dwm... The plural of anecdote is not data.
^dwm... Novelty plus dread equals overreaction.
^dwm... If at first you don't succeed, you fail, and the test will be terminated.
^dwm... Dear God, I would like to file a bug report.
^dwm... Sorry if this is weird, but do you like flying kites?
^ash... Freedom is seldom found, by beating someone to the ground.
^mary... He's got the eyes of a dying lizard!
^mary... Like the lion in winter, like the leopard in the snows of kilimanjaro
^mary... He's as happy as a penguin in a microwave.
^mary... The players are under so much duress, it's like Duressic Park!
^mary... Hang on to your electric kettles...
^mary... That's quality with a capital 'K'!
^mary... Painter's not bothering with an undercoat... He's gone straight to gloss!
^mary... That could be a total eclipse of the Part...
^mary... Even Hypotenuse would have trouble working out these angles.
^mary... Keith Deller's not just an underdog, he's an underpuppy!
^mary... There's only one word for that - magic darts!
^mary... This lad has more checkouts than Tescos.
^mary... As they say at the DHSS, we're getting the full benefit here.
^mary... He's about as predictable as a wasp on speed.
^mary... Jocky Wilson ... what an athlete.
^mary... Bristow reasons ... Bristow quickens ... Aaahhhhh, Bristow.
^mary... That's the greatest comeback since Lazarus.
^mary... He's got a heart as big as Moby Dick!
^mary... Nay, faith, let not me play a woman, I have a bread coming.
^dwm... Traveller, there are no paths. Paths are made by walking.
^dwm... Caminante no hay camino. Se hace camino al andar.
^mary... Laws are like sausages; it is better not to see them being made.
^mary... Usually broad beans
^mary... She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs
^mary... She was as easy as the Daily Star crossword
^mary... Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do
^mary... The red brick wall was the colour of a brick-red crayon
^mary... He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree
^mary... Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever
^mary... Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the centre
^mary... Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze
^mary... Mmm. Lost a planet, Master Obi-Wan has. How embarrassing
^mary... *waves hand* You want to go home and re-think your life
^mary... Norwegian chocolate. Frankly, you buy that stuff the terrorists win
^mary... Organ transplants are best left to the professionals
^mary... I will not charge admission to the bathroom
^mary... I do not have diplomatic immunity
^mary... No one is interested in my underpants
^mary... Mud is not one of the 4 food groups
^mary... Goldfish don't bounce
^mary... The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee
^mary... I will not yell "She's Dead" during roll call
^mary... Teacher is not a leper
^mary... A burp is not an answer
^mary... My name is not Dr. Death
^mary... "Bart Bucks" are not legal tender
^mary... High explosives and school don't mix
^mary... Nobody likes sunburn slappers
^mary... Spitwads are not free speech
^mary... It's potato, not potatoe
^mary... Tar is not a plaything
^dwm... Poo occurs.
^dwm... The excrement is about to hit the air-conditioning.
^dwm... To ask permission is to seek denial.
^dwm... Define interesting. / "Oh God, oh God, we're all going to die?"
^dwm... The Emperor is not as forgiving as I am.
^dwm... You fly that thing? I'm impressed.
^dwm... Never tell me the odds.
^dwm... They're digging in the wrong place!
^dwm... Indy, why does the floor.. move?
^dwm... You have fifteen minutes to reach minimum safe distance.
^dwm... Power corrupts. Absolute power is kinda neat.
^dwm... Power corrupts. PowerPoint corrupts absolutely.
^dwm... However, I stopped wearing ties after I got that printer repair job.
^dwm... The Wright Bothers weren't the first to fly - just the first not to crash.
^ash... Branding: something you do with a hot iron, typically to cattle.
^dwm... It is a book about a Spanish guy called Manual. You should read it.
^dwm... Pedant, n: a person who walks.
^dwm... He's kinda like a very clever notepad.
^dwm... Methinks the lightning rods on church steeples betray a lack of confidence.
^ash... The miraculous involves a voluntary agreement between the two sides.
^dwm... Opening mystery email attachment... now!
^dwm... Dude, your lips move when you type your password.
^mary... When you can't have Prada, have a well-stocked larder.
^mary... We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.
^mary... Some eat and drink to live, how much nicer to live to eat and drink.
^mary... The curve that sets things straight is a smile.
^mary... Everyone is gifted. Some open the package sooner.
^dwm... It won't work on me, I'm already a woman.
^dwm... Buttons are not toys!
^dwm... It must be Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.
^dwm... My whole planet destroyed because you thought someone wanted your autograph!
^dwm... No, that's perfectly normal paranoia. Everyone in the universe gets that.
^mary... If everyone listened to my instructions, it'd be called "12"
^dwm... In the beginning, there was nothing. Which exploded.
^dwm... When all else fails, read the instructions.
^dwm... Dogs can't vote. / Not directly.
^dwm... He looks like our company lawyer, but more surprised.
^dwm... That's the trouble with randomness, you can never be sure.
^ash... No, I will not fix your computer. (Well okay, maybe, for beer.)
^dwm... "We must disimagine the very figment of misunsuccessiveness."
^dwm... "We have to enscare them to the point where they re-becave themselves."
^dwm... "Enemies can either be emboldened or beweakened."
^ash... with your little facts off the internet.
^dwm... "Any sufficiently advanced research is indistinguishable from bullshit."
^mary... No, no, no. Because 'I Can't Get No' is in parenthesis.
^mary... I want to be the guy that puts the tangerine in the toilet.
^mary... Because they were English. It was a tribute to Her Majesty.
^mary... Oh, please. You make Freddy Mercury look straight.
^mary... Suppose you were shaking. Do fries go with it? I'll bet they would.
^mary... We have decided to rob Mick Jagger. Now, how are we gonna rob Mick Jagger?
^mary... I'm afraid he's eating waffles with Jesus this morning.
^mary... I was born with a plastic spork in my ass, just like the rest of you.
^nobody... Usually broad beans
^dwm... Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
^dwm... I'm running a live national broadcast right now, can you threaten me later?
^dwm... If you don't understand the problem then the solution won't make much sense.
^nobody... She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
^nobody... She was as easy as the Daily Star crossword.
^nobody... Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
^nobody... The red brick wall was the colour of a brick-red crayon.
^nobody... He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
^nobody... Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
^nobody... Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the centre
^nobody... Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
^mary... no barn owls, don't do drugs, love you, good night!
^mary... I'm a pacifist. But, when the revolution comes, I'll destroy all of you
^mary... Get your sorry, non-believer ass out of my chair.
^mary... He's Satan in a smock!
^mary... No man should have to outlive his fictional wizard!
^mary... Ah, Sliced Bread, a wonderful Lady MacBeth.
^mary... It's not like Phil Spiderman. He's a spider *man*
^mary... There should *be* a gold man!
^mary... Why isn't it Spiderman? You know, like Goldman, Silverman.
^mary... no uterus, no opinion.
^mary... it's apples and oranges, it's, it's orthodontists and lesbians
^mary... You don't wanna mess with corn nuts. They're craaazy.
^mary... I feel violated...and not in a good way
^ash... \, backslash : an unsolicited gift of the computer keyboard
^mary... Oh God! Fortune vomits on my eiderdown once more!
^mary... We're as similar as two completely dissimilar things in a pod.
^mary... I shall return...interfrastically.
^mary... I've got a plan so cunning, you could put a tail on it & call it a weasel.
^mary... Do you have any goal in life other than the acquisition of turnips?
^mary... Pitt the Toddler? Pitt the Embryo? Pitt the Glit in the Milkman's Eye?
^mary... My head feels like there's a Frenchman living in it!
^mary... I have the heart & stomach of a concrete elephant.
^mary... The devil farts in my face once more.
^mary... That's very ironic, because I have a thingy that's shaped like a turnip.
^mary... For where there are others, there are people to fornicate with!
^mary... Bloody potatoes. Next thing you know, they'll be eating them.
^mary... Beneath is boyish exterior beats the heart of a ruthless, sadistic maniac!
^mary... Goggles on, last one back's a homo! Hooray!
^mary... I'll fly back home and give your wife something to hang her towels on!
^mary... Ok chums, let's doooooo it. As the bishop said to the netball team.
^mary... The blood, the noise, the endless poetry.
^mary... A maternally crazed gorilla would come in handy at this very moment.
^mary... I made a note in my diary on the way over here. It simply reads - bugger
^mary... I think the phrase rhymes with Clucking Bell!
^mary... Jump 200 feet in the air and scatter oneself over a wide area
^mary... I can give multiple orgasms to the furniture just by sitting on it.
^mary... The pants haven't been built yet that can take the job on!
^mary... That's how I like my girls...straight and to my point.
^mary... Treat your kite like you treat your woman
^mary... A tongue like an electric eel and she likes the taste of a man's tonsils.
^mary... Still worshipping God? Last time I heard, he was worshipping me!
^mary... Did not our Lord send a lowly earthworm to comfort Moses in his torment?
^mary... My mother told me to stand up to homicidal maniacs.
^mary... And the Dorset horse fetishists fair tomorrow?
^mary... With the Blacksmith's strike in its fifteenth week?
^mary... A bare fortnight after the dreaded horse plague of old London town?
^mary... Hire you a horse? For ninepence? On Jewish new year in the rain?
^mary... It's like goldy and bronzy, only it's made of iron.
^mary... I can't marry, I'm young, I'm firm buttocked.
^mary... I'm a gay bachelor. I'm a roarer, a rogerer, a gorger and a puker!
^mary... You look like a bird who's swallowed a plate.
^mary... It's me, Flash! Flash by name, Flash by nature. Hurrah!
^mary... Thanks bridesmaid, like the beard. Gives me something to hang on to.
^mary... Where haven't I been! Woof!
^mary... I want to get to the reception so I can get squiffy and seduce someone.
^mary... A leech on my ear for ear ache, a leech on my bottom for constipation.
^mary... Surely you will be allowed to starve to death in one of the royal parks.
^nobody... Mmm. Lost a planet, Master Obi-Wan has. How embarrassing.
^nobody... *waves hand* You want to go home and re-think your life.
^dwm... I couldn't be arsed to setup MythTV, so I just use BitTorrent.
^mary... In five years we’ll all either be working for him or be dead by his hand.
^mary... I have bigger things to worry about than my personal life.
^mary... Hey, look at you. You look like a fancy prostitute.
^mary... Those shoes are bi-curious
^ash... although they've never won a war or mass-produced a decent car
^dwm... remember, "stressed" backwards spells "desserts"!
^dwm... Many electrons were severely inconvenienced by the sending of this message.
^dwm... You look like you're having fun in a way that's... evil and clever.
^dwm... Scientific progress goes 'boink'?
^dwm... Any technology distinguishable from magic is insufficiently advanced.
^mary... Interesting, the trousers conceal a tiny, secondary, horn.
^mary... Why am I sticky and naked? Did I miss something fun?
^mary... I have shocking data revelant to this conversation.
^mary... Verily. And that past nastification is what shields you from the brains!
^mary... Did everything just taste purple for a second?
^mary... We live long and are celebrated poopers!
^mary... I know you in the future! I clean your poop!
^ash... What is on second. / I'm not asking you who's on second. / Who's on first.
^ash... but actually you have to push this little button here.
^ash... They say 'nothing beats a Bud'. It does, and it isn't even close.
^ash... This is the story of how we begin to remember.
^ash... You anti-semantic bastard.
^ash... If we don't upgrade our servers, a herd of trolls will attack headquarters.
^nobody... Norwegian chocolate. Frankly, you buy that stuff the terrorists win.
^ash... Makes perfect sense. Except for the pronouns!
^dwm... Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo
^dwm... Excellent day for putting Slinkies on an escalator.
^dwm... It has just been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
^dwm... That's not a bug - that's a flaw in the universe.
^dwm... Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
^dwm... A procrastinator's work is never done.
^dwm... Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum
^dwm... Change is inevitable -- except from a vending machine.
^dwm... End User, v: An act technical support staff sometimes wish to carry out.
^dwm... Great minds think alike... but fools seldom differ.
^dwm... You're just jealous because the little voices are talking to me.
^dwm... The best way to get from one pun to another is with a straight line.
^dwm... Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature.
^dwm... f u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgrmmng.
^dwm... You don't have to be mad to work here -- we provide on-the-job training.
^ash... You shouldn't anthropomorphise computers - they don't like it.
^ash... We are 13.7 billion light-years from the edge
^ash... Maybe get a little conversation / Drink a little red wine
^ash... These are the roots of rhythm / And the roots of rhythm remain
^ash... Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
^ash... Proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
^ash... Hearts full of youth, hearts full of truth/Six parts gin to one vermouth.
^ash... Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
^ash... bright XOR early
^ash... But I've reason to believe / We all will be received / In Graceland
^ash... my biggest problem is I've been cursed with the ability to do the math.
^ash... there's no I in 'team'. There is a me, though, if you jumble it up.
^ash... either that or get my hair highlighted. Smugness is easier to maintain.
^ash... Wait till Intel gets outside. Then we'll be really fucked.
^ash... Ah, no, sir. I've just been jabbing it too hard.
^ash... 0118 999 881 999 119 725...3
^mary... Your cholesterol. It comes from pizza...and your parents.
^ash... Oh, Black River / Gonna take my cares away
^ash... I go out walking, in any season / It could be rainin', it could be freezin'
^nobody... Organ transplants are best left to the professionals
^nobody... I will not charge admission to the bathroom
^nobody... I do not have diplomatic immunity
^nobody... No one is interested in my underpants
^nobody... Mud is not one of the 4 food groups
^nobody... Goldfish don't bounce
^nobody... The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee
^nobody... I will not yell "She's Dead" during roll call
^nobody... Teacher is not a leper
^nobody... A burp is not an answer
^nobody... My name is not Dr. Death
^nobody... "Bart Bucks" are not legal tender
^nobody... High explosives and school don't mix
^nobody... Nobody likes sunburn slappers
^nobody... Spitwads are not free speech
^nobody... It's potato, not potatoe
^nobody... Tar is not a plaything
^ash... Turkmenistan to US: We didn't order these pizzas. [ww]
^ash... I enjoy a good slug of gin at lunch, but I've learned to do without. [ww]
^ash... There has never been a <blink> tag in HTML.
^ash... Somebody's gotta be the designated drinker. [w&g]
^ash... He's like a female k.d. lang.
^ash... the principle of Buddhism is not "every man for himself".
^ash... No. Not at any time, only when it was f-f-f-funny!
^ash... Well, we used to until a few other nations pushed in front.
^ash... Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
^ash... Yeah, I heard about that. It was neck-and-neck and then she skipped lunch.
^ash... Don't worry, I saw Lord of the Rings. I'm not going to end this 17 times.
^ash... Think about the time constant, man.
^ash... But should be sufficiently accurate for the purposes of poetry.
^ash... We are all special cases. -Camus
^ash... I think it would be a very good idea.
^mary... Don't worry, I saw Lord of the Rings. I'm not going to end this 17 times
^mary... This isn't good cop, bad cop. This is fag and New Yorker
^mary... Flingle. Glorg. Glorg and a gloob
^mary... You'd sacrifice a beautiful woman to save a moderately-attractive monkey?
^mary... Would you like some human with your salt?
^mary... Someone's acting awfully aluminum
^mary... I filled up on nuts at the negotiation
^mary... We'll need an army of super-virile men scoring 'round the clock!
^mary... You will provide us with 198 billion humans. And, uh, small fries
^mary... We will begin with the firemen then the math teachers and so on
^ash... If it's December 1941 in Casablanca, what time is it in New York?
^ash... Welcome back to the fight. This time I know our side will win.
^ash... Some day they may be scarce.
^ash... That makes Rick a citizen of the world.
^ash... I'm a drunkard. / That makes Rick a citizen of the world.
^ash... Major Strasser has been shot. Round up the usual suspects.
^ash... They say 'nothing beats a bud' - they're dead right, I'll take the nothing.
^mary... What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
^mary... Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom! boom!
^mary... You can't have your kayak and heat it too.
^mary... I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle.
^mary... My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.
^mary... I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but couldn't find any
^mary... If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key
^ash... An Englishman, even if he is alone, forms an orderly queue of one.
^ash... Budweiser: Know better beer.
^ash... Budweiser? No. Better beer.
^ash... 'I would give all my fame for a pot of ale, and safety.'
^ash... 'Would I were in an alehouse in London!'
^ash... They say 'nothing beats a Bud'. Given the choice, I'll take the nothing...
^ash... If there are no problems handily available, engineers will create their own.
^ash... So, just how many is a brazillion?
^ash... If I believe I cannot do something, it makes me incapable of doing it.
^ash... I think it would be a good idea.
^ash... The Christian Right is neither.
^ash... Nuts to your white mice.
^ash... Where's the kaboom? There was supposed to be an earth-shattering kaboom.
^ash... The door's not shut / On my genius but / I just don't have the time.
^mary... Trying is the first step towards failure.
^mary... Oh, honey, I didn't get drunk, I just went to a strange fantasy world.
^mary... De-fault! The two sweetest words in the English language.
^mary... Asleep at the switch! I wasn't asleep! I was drunk!
^mary... If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing.
^mary... You're everywhere. You're omnivorous.
^mary... Why do things I love always burn?
^mary... Engage candy bar!
^mary... A man full of bile is not fit to pronounce on food.
^mary... and then Squirry the Squirrel went Ni, Ni, Ni and they went home for tea.
^mary... I sit on Nathaniel! Two spikes would be an extravagence!
^mary... Chairs are the work of Belezabub! At our house Nathaniel sits on a spike!
^mary... Make a sentence out of the following words: face, sodding, your, shut.
^mary... So we three alone in all the world can produce the finest green at will.
^mary... it's not really a nugget, it's more of a splat.
^mary... Cold is God's way of telling us to burn more Catholics.
^mary... I've got a plan, and it's as hot as my pants.
^mary... Ointment, that's what you need when your head's cut off.
^mary... Hot potato, orchestra stalls, Puck will make amends.
^mary... Sounds like a bag of grapefruits to me.
^mary... Some people say I'm mad, and say the word "penguin" after each sentence.
^mary... What a way to die. Shot by a transvestite on a unrealistic grassy knoll.
^mary... I now call on the Leader of the Opposition to test me on my Latin vocab.
^mary... George, who is using the family brain cell at the moment?
^mary... I shall be known from now on, as the Black Vegetable.
^mary... Why, some people over there aren't fighting, they're just lying down!
^mary... I have coveted my father's adultery and not honored my neighbor's ass.
^ash... God bless Djibouti.
^ash... You have to devise a system that goes faster the more popular it is...
^ash... 'What sort of a transportation system d'you call this?'
^ash... 'Purple Pangalin!' exclaimed the Journalist.
^ash... slightly smaller than Oregon.
^ash... Holy Belgium, man!
^ash... Share and enjoy.
^ash... Relax and enjoy your shoes.
^ash... Satyameva Jayate : Truth alone triumphs
^ash... Where I come from a boss is something you defeat at the end of the level.
^ash... Away goals are worth one plus epsilon.
^ash... What do we want? Gradual reform / When do we want it? In due course.
^ash... Early to bed, early to rise - means you never see anyone else.
^ash... Do I know what rhetorical means?!
^ash... It's my money father, I just didn't want to fill out the forms!
^ash... Doggie-dog world.
^ash... Gazpacho tactics.
^ash... Meep meep.
^mary... lousy stupid Denver
^mary... lousy traumatic childhood
^mary... lousy cops
^mary... lousy drunks
^mary... lousy Wiggum
^mary... lousy job
^mary... lousy Community Service
^mary... lousy teachers
^mary... lousy loveable dog
^mary... lousy traffic jam
^mary... lousy democrats
^mary... lousy God
^mary... lousy bragging know-it-all show-off
^mary... stupid King of Troy
^mary... stupid Bartoon
^mary... stupid French
^mary... stupid hippo
^mary... stupid movie
^mary... stupid script
^mary... stupid non-magical son
^mary... stupid game
^mary... stupid chair
^mary... stupid pothole
^mary... stupid lunch chair
^mary... stupid Lisa
^mary... stupid crow
^mary... stupid switch
^mary... stupid teachers
^mary... stupid TV
^mary... stupid carbon rod
^mary... stupid rod
^mary... stupid bike
^mary... stupid dead woman
^mary... stupid poetic justice
^mary... stupid itchy church pants
^mary... stupid roller skate
^mary... stupid anti-fist-shaking laws
^mary... stupid sexy Flanders
^mary... stupid economic recovery
^mary... stupid gravity
^mary... Mmm ... something
^mary... Mmm ... waffle runoff
^mary... Mmm ... Marge
^mary... Mmm ... various eggs
^mary... Mmm ... urinal fresh
^mary... Mmm ... the land of chocolate
^mary... Mmm ... tasty
^mary... Mmm ... strained peas
^mary... Mmm ... spaghetti
^mary... Mmm ... soylent green
^mary... Mmm ... snouts
^mary... Mmm ... slanty
^mary... Mmm ... shrimp
^mary... Mmm ... sandwich
^mary... Mmm ... salty
^mary... Mmm ... sacrilicious
^mary... Mmm ... rich creamery butter
^mary... Mmm ... reprocessed pig fat
^mary... Mmm ... recirculated air
^mary... Mmm ... purple
^mary... Mmm ... potato chips
^mary... Mmm ... pointy
^mary... Mmm ... pistol whip
^mary... Mmm ... pie
^mary... Mmm ... organized crime
^mary... Mmm ... mediciny
^mary... Mmm ... open-faced club sandwich
^mary... Mmm ... memo
^mary... Mmm ... macamadamia nuts
^mary... Mmm ... marshmallows
^mary... Mmm ... invisible cola
^mary... Mmm ... incapacitating
^mary... Mmm ... hug
^mary... Mmm ... horse doovers
^mary... Mmm ... honey-smoked bacon
^mary... Mmm ... hogan berry
^mary... Mmm ... hog fat
^mary... Mmm ... hippo
^mary... Mmm ... hamburgers
^mary... Mmm ... ham
^mary... Mmm ... gummy-bear
^mary... Mmm ... gum with a cracker center
^mary... Mmm ... grapefruit
^mary... Mmm ... ginger bread house
^mary... Mmm ... fuzzy
^mary... Mmm ... forbidden donut
^mary... Mmm ... fresh batch of American balls
^mary... Mmm ... free wig
^mary... Mmm ... free goo
^mary... Mmm ... foot-long chili dog
^mary... Mmm ... floorpie
^mary... Mmm ... fattening
^mary... Mmm ... elephant fresh
^mary... Mmm ... danish
^mary... Mmm ... crumbled-up cookie things
^mary... Mmm ... convenient
^mary... Mmm ... chocolate
^mary... Mmm ... carmel bologna
^mary... Mmm ... caramel
^mary... Mmm ... candy
^mary... Mmm ... business deal
^mary... Mmm ... burger
^mary... Mmm ... beernut
^mary... Mmm ... bowling alley fresh
^mary... Mmm ... beer
^mary... Mmm ... apple
^mary... Mmm ... bacon
^mary... Mmm ... 64 slices of American cheese
^mary... Mmm ... 52 slices of American cheese
^mary... Mmm ... 50 dollar pretzel
^mary... Ack! A rock! Quick, Marge, call a geologist!
^ash... I am badly in need of a manicure.
^ash... If you will just take me. / It might just complete me.
^ash... And together we can make a stand.
^ash... Woody Guthrie's land can't feed Mother.
^mary... You're never closer to God than when you are on television.
^mary... It's true what they say, you don't buy tequila, you rent it.
^mary... Part of me is angry but a part of me is proud. The rest of me is just drunk
^mary... It will be 911 times 2356.
^mary... You had me at "dicks fuck assholes"
^mary... America, fuck yeah!
^mary... You have balls. I like balls.
^mary... I was raped by Mister Mephisophiles.
^mary... I don't want lingerie that goldfish could live in.
^mary... Who needs brains when you can lick your own eyebrows?
^mary... I've copped a feel, might as well feel a cop.
^mary... That's the pot calling the kettle taupe.
^mary... That's so funny I forgot you're fat.
^mary... Close your mouth, you look like you're missing a chromosome.
^mary... What are you lookin' at, Rogaine failure?
^mary... Grab a bottle, hunker down and pray for daylight.
^mary... I think you can learn to live on this. I mean Spain does.
^mary... One woman's sexual harassment is another woman's night off.
^mary... Honey, your words are rockin' my world and my pants.
^mary... Who are you to judge, Judy?
^mary... And so ends a scene from "Mr. Bitch Goes to Washington"
^mary... Oh, honey, come on, gay, straight, bi, ti, they don't like change.
^mary... We're just like 50 men and a mirrored ball away from being a gay disco.
^mary... Spay him, spray him, throw him in a bag, and let's get out of here!
^mary... Hello, dark roast, my old friend.
^mary... Oh Lord, honey, you are just as simple as that blouse you're wearin'.
^mary... I am a lawyer, which means, unlike you, I actually *passed* a bar.
^mary... My ride is here. It looks like a huff. I think I'll leave in it.
^mary... I bitch-slapped the law, and the law won.
^mary... Welcome to Cynical Island, population: you.
^mary... What's going on, what's happening, what's this all about?
^mary... Let's touch stomachs.
^ash... let that boy boogie-woogie / it's in him / and it got to come out
^ash... Practice random acts of kindness and senseless acts of beauty.
^ash... Might I ask what you expected to see out of a Torquay hotel bedroom window?
^ash... He made us believe a man could fly. [CR 1952-2004]
^mary... Amphibious-landing-craft-shape? Sledgehammer-in-the-testicles shape?
^mary... What shape do you prefer? Mickey Mouse shape? Smartarse shape?
^mary... Please! Try to understand this conversation before one of us dies.
^mary... Easier to find a packet of sliced hippopotamus in suitcase sauce
^mary... Just my way of getting through the day, dear. The Samaritans were engaged.
^mary... Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl.
^mary... A satisfied customer. We should have him stuffed.
^mary... Wanted, kind home for enormous savage rodent. Answers to the name of Sybil.
^mary... You have rats in Spain, don't you - or did Franco have them all shot?
^mary... You *can* see the sea. It's over there between the land and the sky.
^mary... might I ask what you expected to see out of a Torquay hotel bedroom window?
^mary... I'll ruin you. You'll never waitress in Torquay again.
^mary... Don't mention the war. I mentioned it once but I think I got away with it.
^mary... You never know where to look when eating a banana.
^mary... Its impossible to describe the smell of a wet cat.
^mary... I think I'll have a lie down. No I won't, I'll go and hit some guests.
^mary... You'll have to forgive him. He's from Barcelona.
^mary... In every plate of chips there is a bad chip.
^mary... You never ever run out of salt.
^mary... Driving through a tunnel makes you feel excited.
^mary... Its impossible to look cool whilst picking up a Frisbee.
^mary... Some days you see lots of people on crutches.
^mary... Everyone always remembers the day a dog ran into your school.
^mary... You always feel a bit scared when stroking horses.
^mary... Rummaging in an overgrow garden will always turn up a bouncy ball.
^mary... Prodding a fire with a stick makes you feel manly.
^mary... Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
^mary... What do people in China call their good plates?
^mary... Why is a person that handles your money called a broker?
^mary... If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
^mary... Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
^mary... Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones.
^mary... At the end of every party there is always a girl crying.
^mary... You've never quite sure whether it's ok to eat green crisps.
^mary... Reading when you're drunk is horrible.
^mary... Sharpening a pencil with a knife makes you feel really manly.
^mary... Why does your gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed?
^mary... Right planet, wrong universe.
^mary... One's never alone with a rubber duck.
^mary... Rome wasn't burned in a day.
^mary... ten out of ten for style, but minus several million for good thinking
^mary... Nuts to your white mice.
^mary... Well, that's it. Good guy wins. Bad guy loses. Big freagin' surprise.
^mary... apathetic bloody planet, I've no sympathy at all.
^mary... Sometimes you gotta grab life by the haunches and hump it into submission.
^mary... It's time to separate the awkwardly feminine from the possibly Canadian.
^mary... It's time to separate the weak from the chafed.
^mary... You had me at blood and semen.
^mary... Kate, it's time for you to put your mouth where our balls are.
^mary... You all are about as useful as a cock-flavoured lolly pop.
^mary... It's like watching a bunch of retards trying to hump a doorknob.
^mary... Nobody makes me bleed my own blood. NOBODY.
^ash... But why is the rum gone?
^ash... We mustn't underestimate American blundering.
^ash... You played it for her, you can play it for me.
^ash... If she can stand it, I can. Play it.
^ash... Play it once, Sam. For old time's sake.
^ash... Flux-capacitor... fluxing...
^ash... You mean your father's German, you're half German and you married a German?
^ash... It's short for ... Bob.
^ash... We are all individuals!
^ash... Yes, we are all different!
^ash... I am NOT the Messiah!
^ash... Liebchen - sweetnessheart, what watch? / Ten watch. / Such much?
^ash... I'm shocked - shocked - to find that gambling is going on in here.
^ash... We'll be there at six! I'll be there at ten.
^mary... Don't run, we are your friends.
^mary... Elvis is not dead. He just went home.
^mary... Flattery will get you nowhere... but don't stop trying.
^mary... At my signal, unleash hell.
^mary... Unlike the Americans, we prefer not to get our bad news from CNN.
^mary... I remember every detail. The Germans wore grey, you wore blue.
^mary... Roads? Where we're going we don't need roads.
^mary... Flux-capacitor... fluxing...
^mary... if we blow up Kansas the world may not hear about it for years.
^mary... I'm your density. I mean... your destiny.
^mary... why don't you make like a tree and get outta here.
^mary... It's amazing the clarity that comes with psychotic jealousy.
^mary... You stupid bunnies!
^ash... Beer good. Beer foamy.
^mary... I'd much rather see you on my side, than scattered into...atoms.
^mary... Lions, and tigers, and bears! Oh, my!
^mary... We must be over the rainbow!
^mary... I'm not afraid of anything -- except a lighted match.
^mary... You have no power here! Now begone, before somebody drops a house on you!
^mary... Some people without brains do an awful lot of talking.
^mary... Aristotle was not Belgian.
^mary... the principle of Buddhism is not "every man for himself".
^mary... the London Underground is not a political movement.
^mary... Don't eat the green ones, they're not quite ripe.
^mary... Bring me... the bore worms.
^mary... You shot the invisible swordsman!
^mary... That's the one good thing about me. I never do the same wrong thing twice.
^mary... Tomorrow is always fresh with no mistakes in it.
^mary... What do you mean? An African or European swallow?
^mary... What... is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
^mary... I fart in your general direction.
^mary... Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.
^mary... He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!
^mary... If she weighs the same as a duck... she's made of wood.
^mary... "Get her." That was your whole plan. I like it - it was scientific.
^mary... A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste.
^mary... When someone asks you if you're a god, you say yes.
^mary... Leave it to the Catholics to destroy existence.
^mary... You ever notice how all the prices end in nine? Damn, that's eerie.
^mary... All "Jedi" had was a bunch of Muppets.
^mary... I'm not even supposed to be here today!
^mary... Melodrama coming from you is about as natural as an oral bowel movement.
^mary... NOBODY steps on a church in my town.
^mary... We came, we saw, we kicked its ass.
^mary... if you don't have anything nice to say about anybody, come sit by me!
^mary... Either I have a monster in my kitchen or I'm completely crazy.
^mary... Only grown-up men are scared of women.
^mary... Well, the Pope may be French, but Jesus is English! You're on!
^mary... I'm well aware a good fonging is on the way.
^mary... It's called a lance. Hello?
^mary... But a full stomach, that dream can come true.
^mary... We're the sons of peasants. Glory and riches and stars are beyond our grasp
^mary... I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.
^mary... Looks like the cows have come home to roost.
^mary... having your nuts bit off by a Laplander. That's the way I want to go.
^mary... The aerodynamics work! He's breaking wind at 90!
^mary... You eat one lousy foot and they call you a cannibal. What a world!
^mary... when Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset, people DIE!
^mary... Why must I be surrounded by frickin' idiots?
^mary... They've gone to plaid!
^mary... I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate.
^mary... now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb.
^mary... Out of order? FUCK! Even in the future, nothing works!
^mary... at last we meet again for the first time for the last time.
^mary... How can you be deaf with ears like that?
^mary... The more they overthink the plumbing, the easier it is to stop up the drain
^mary... The word is no. I am therefore going anyway.
^mary... but as we say on Earth, c'est la vie.
^mary... Boy, for a gunman, you sure are a pessimist.
^mary... I'm not crazy; I'm just colorful.
^mary... I have vision, and the rest of the world wears bifocals.
^mary... the wool from the black sheep is just as warm.
^mary... Somewhere out there is a lady who I think will never be a nun.
^mary... You mean to tell me you sold your everlasting soul for *that*?
^mary... I detect, like me, you're endowed with the gift of gab.
^mary... it's a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart.
^mary... A lot of respectable people have been hit by trains.
^mary... Wait a minute - who elected you leader of this outfit?
^mary... We’ll jump off that bridge when we get to it.
^mary... I tried working once. Not worth it. Takes up your whole day!
^ash... Draft beer, not people
^mary... Remember, you can always find East by staring directly at the sun.
^mary... It's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get.
^mary... You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head.
^mary... Bushes are nice 'cause they don't have prickers. Unless they do.
^mary... Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me, I have a wife and kids! Eat them!
^mary... I bent my wookie.
^mary... Television -- teacher, mother, secret lover!
^mary... Oh, well, of course, everything looks bad if you remember it.
^mary... Oh, right, right, with the bones. I always forget about the bones.
^mary... It takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.
^mary... Dasher, Dancer ... Prancer ... Nixon, Comet, Cupid ... Donna Dixon.
^mary... Is the space-pope reptilian?
^mary... See, it's not that I'm lazy...it's that I just don't care.
^mary... I didn't sell out...I bought in.
^mary... As if by magic, I can create a big crowd of invisible ducks.
^mary... How come all the rocks are different sizes?
^mary... Feck! Nuns! Reverse! Reverse!
^mary... You wouldn't find Hitler playing jungle music at 3 o'clock in the morning.
^mary... Attention please, a child has been lost in the tunnel of goats.
^mary... Wait a second. You're Elvis as well!
^mary... It's nice to have a nun around. Gives the place a bit of glamour.
^mary... Those women were in the nip!
^mary... Father Clippit says a good long mass. Four hours he does. Since his stroke.
^mary... DON'T TELL ME I'M STILL ON THAT FECKIN' ISLAND!!!
^mary... You will address me by my proper title, you little bollocks!
^mary... I put the rabbits in the last place he'd think of them - his own room!
^mary... It's like a great big tide of jam. But jam made out of... old women.
^mary... Spider-Baby. It's got the body of a spider, and the mind of a baby.
^mary... So there he is. Risen from the dead. Like that feller.... E.T
^mary... No, it is the bad kind of puppy.
^mary... A rock! A dog! The earth!
^mary... Paper! Snow! A ghost!
^ash... must ... find ... antidote
^ash... 'I never make predictions. I never have, and I never will.' TB
^ash... 'Why does everything always come down to money in this bank?'
^mary... Obstruct the doors, cause delays and anger us
^mary... Obstruct the doors, cause delays and be dangerous
^mary... Never say your mother had a jibber
^mary... This is a Joey heavy episode anyway
^mary... I tied my shoes once and, believe me, it is highly over-rated
^mary... completely free from infection, to be used at your discretion
^mary... the penis, mightier than the sword
^mary... there is a very fine line between love and nausea
^mary... You've burnt the food, the shelter, the rum!
^mary... but why is the rum gone?
^mary... but I can't bring this ship in to Tortuga all by my onesie, savvy?
^mary... Return to Zenda
^mary... ...phone the police and tell them your house is being burgled
^mary... Invite them all in. Nip out the back door
^mary... ...hide any little green women you’ve got in the house
^mary... If little green men land in your back yard
^mary... And I'm also a mento for kids. A mento? You know, a mento, a role model.
^mary... Is it still raining? I hadn't noticed
^mary... No-one gets murdered, or married, or in a tricky situation over a pound note
^mary... It's a doggy-dog world
^mary... Folkies: people who play by ear and sing through their noses
^mary... vitae lampada ferimus
^mary... Paper or plastic?
^mary... Food, fun and flexible hours
^mary... If music be the food of love, why don't rabbits play banjos?
^mary... Women are from Omicron Persei 7, men are from Omicron Persei 9
^mary... That would be an ecumenical matter.
^mary... Here's a tip, don't fly on payday.
^ash... That would be an ecumenical matter.
^ash... Through tangled threads and corporate crimes
^ash... The internet: harnessing the power of crazy people.
^ash... Knife goes in, guts come out, that's what OsakaSeafoodConcern is all about.
^ash... Don't give me that Star Trek crap. It's too early in the morning.
^ash... Many cooks make light work.
^ash... It's not the years, honey, it's the mileage.
^ash... Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?
^ash... "They're digging in the wrong place."
^ash... There are 10 kinds of people: those who understand binary & those who don't.
^ash... There are 10 kinds of people in the world
^ash... "Six pints of bitter ... and quickly please, the world's about to end."
^ash... Where is the man who has so much as to be out of danger?
^ash... Goldfish in the privacy of bowls do it
^ash... In shallow shoals English soles do it
^ash... Birds do it, bees do it / Even educated fleas do it
^ash... Google this -- outlook-illegal-in-the-eu
^ash... Friends don't let friends use Outlook
^ash... Sam, if it's December 1941 in Casablanca, what time is it in New York?
^ash... `-.,, ><((("> `-.,, ><((("> `-.,, ><((("> `-.,, ><(((">
^ash... Not everything that counts can be counted
^ash... Not everything that can be counted counts
^ash... The only difference is that there is no cat.
^ash... Seal walks into a club...
^ash... Google-this-tagline
^ash... ' ' -- Charlie Chaplin
^ash... Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum viditur
^ash... it's about how much copper wire you can get out of the building with.
^ash... now I'm a wounded dwarf with the mystical strength of a doily.
^ash... Greedo didn't shoot first.
^ash... Poverty stole your golden shoes / It didn't steal your laughter
^ash... I will gather myself around my faith / For light does the darkness most fear
^ash... Free Mars with every starfury
^ash... 'Cause the chains which once held us are only the chains which we've made
^ash... Why reinvent the wheel? Because we can make it rounder...
^ash... #12 Fancy. To be sexually attracted to or to desire. Also a tea cake.
^ash... It's a moo point. Like a cow's opinion. It just doesn't matter. It's moo.
^ash... Failure is not an option. It comes bundled with your copy of Windows
^gef... Jesus, protect me from your followers!
^gef... Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
^gef... Vah! Denuone Latine loquebar? Me ineptum. Interdum modo elabitur.
^gef... Brevis esse laboro, Obscurus fio.
^gef... Born Again Pagan
^gef... Campus Crusade for Cthulhu: It Found Me!
^gef... Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre?
^ash... Please do not feed the feeping creature.
^ash... To invent, you need a good imagination and a pile of junk.
^ash... "I'm too sexy for my code." - Awk Sed Fred
^ash... It's not the heat, it's the humanity
^ash... 'Cause the chains which once held us / Are only the chains which we've made
^ash... We are everyday angels, Be careful with me 'cause I'd like to stay that way
^ash... Truth, justice and --- other stuff
^ash... They all laughed at Whitney and his cotton gin
^ash... They all laughed at Christopher Columbus / when he said the world was round
^ash... They all laughed when Edison recorded sound
^ash... They all laughed at Wilbur and his brother / when they said man could fly
^ash... They told Marconi, wireless was a phony
^ash... They all laughed at Fulton and his steamboat/Hershey and his chocolate bar
^ash... Ford and his Lizzy, kept the laughers busy
^ash... You are in a maze of little twisting passages, all alike.
^ash... You are in a maze of little twisting passages, all different.
^ash... Pray to God, but keep rowing to shore. - Russian proverb
^ash... Computers don't actually think. You just think they think. (We think.)
^ash... You can have it all laid out in front of you - but it don't make you think.
^ash... I am not young enough to know everything.
^ash... The byte is mightier than the bite.
^ash... Your body is a template.
^ash... All things in moderation - especially moderation.
^ash... Will I reach the goal, so long sought after, so long pursued?
^ash... Have you noticed how we only win the World Cup under a Labour government?
^ash... Penalties do not deter men when their conscience is aroused.
^ash... Football is a game for rough girls, not suitable for delicate boys.
^ash... Each succeeds in reaching the goal by a different method.
^ash... All human history moves towards one great goal.
^ash... I must confess, I was born at a very early age.
^ash... Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?
^ash... Room service? Send up a larger room.
^ash... 'Keep this door closed at all times' (!?)
^ash... Reality television - it's one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
^ash... No longer lend your strength to that which you wish to be free from.
^ash... Fill your lives with love and bravery and you shall lead a life uncommon.
^ash... Lend your voices only to sounds of freedom.
^ash... Non co-operation with evil is as much a duty as co-operation with good.
^ash... universe -G 6.672e-11 -e 1.602e-19 -h 6.626e-34 -protonmass 1.673e-27....
^ash... The instructions said to use Windows 98 or better - so I installed FreeBSD.
^ash... The emacs religion: to be saved, control excess...
^ash... If you don't gosub a program loop you'll never get a subroutine.
^ash... Something wonderful has happened...
^ash... Blessed are the young for they shall inherit the national debt.
^ash... Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground
^ash... I'm pink therefore I'm SPAM
^ash... The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.
^ash... "Hey, imp!" shouted Vlad, the imp hailer.
^ash... "I have an inferiority complex, but it isn't a very good one."
^ash... "The meek shall inherit the Earth, if that's all right with you."
^ash... 'Albert, stop telling God what to do.' -Niels Bohr
^ash... Computers are like Old Testament gods; lots of rules and no mercy.
^ash... "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away" pkd
^ash... A camel is a horse designed by a committee.
^ash... Never put off until run time what you can do at compile time.
^ash... C++ - The language in which only friends can access your private members.
^ash... There is a one line proof... if we start sufficiently far to the left.
^ash... No longer lend your strength to that which you do not believe in
^ash... Every silver lining has a cloud.
^ash... On the other hand, you have different fingers.
^ash... Forecast for tonight: Dark.
^ash... Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...
^ash... Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
^ash... It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
^ash... Quantum particles: the dreams that stuff is made of.
^ash... I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
^ash... I'm out of bed and dressed, what more do you want?
^ash... Why be difficult, when with a bit of effort, you can be impossible.
^ash... Whatever doesn't kill me can still bloody hurt.
^ash... A closed mouth gathers no foot.
^ash... Avoid temporary variables and strange women.
^ash... Multitasking: Screwing up several things at once...
^ash... Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
^ash... "Liberals, intellectuals, peace mongers, idiots"
^ash... "We have to strike now sir! Annihilate! Kill! Kill! Kill!"
^ash... Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do.
^ash... Time's fun when you're having flies.
^ash... Fruit flies like a banana
^ash... Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum.
^ash... If I could tell the world just one thing / It would be that we're all OK
^ash... you wake up to realize your standard of living somehow got stuck on survive
^ash... Don't matter what side it lands on if it's someone else's dime.
^ash... My hands are small I know / But they're not yours, they are my own
^ash... I won't be made useless / I won't be idle with despair
^ash... And not to worry 'cause worry is wasteful/And useless in times like these
^ash... Bright *and* early? Er, no. Pick.
^ash... 8//=/\-,
^ash... Just how much justice can you afford? <Londo>
^ash... You shouldn't hit people. Children are people.
^ash... If rats are experimented on, they will develop cancer.
^ash... Be careful of your thoughts, they may become words at any moment.
^ash... If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
^ash... "Forty-two," said Deep Thought, with infinite magesty and calm.
^ash... Anything that doesn't kill me can still bloody hurt.
^ash... The world is coming to an end ... SAVE YOUR BUFFERS!!!
^ash... Windows - delete as applicable
^ash... If God played dice. She'd win.
^ash... If God played dice. He'd win.
^ash... The real world is a special case.
^ash... Zen Master to hotdog vendor: "Make me one with everything."
^ash... A week is a long time in politics and three weeks is twice as long.
^ash... If you're going to walk on thin ice, you may as well dance.
^ash... Give your child mental blocks for Christmas.
^ash... "Your superior intellect is no match for our puny weapons"
^ash... I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way.
^ash... [Warning on knife]: Caution. Blade is sharp. Keep out of children.
^ash... Baby carrots - vegetarian veal
^ash... Rick Blaine: Are my eyes really brown?
^ash... I am a drunkard... a citizen of the world.
^ash... You can no more win a war than you can win an earthquake.
^ash... Those who live by the sword get shot.
^ash... Avoid generalisations: they are NEVER valid.
^ash... I think, therefore I am. I think.
^ash... Do not look where you fell, but where you slipped.
^ash... A friend's eye is a good mirror.
^ash... He who gets a name for early rising can stay in bed until midday.
^ash... Promoveatur ut amoveatur.
^ash... Docendo discimus.
^ash... Iniuria non excusat iniuriam.
^ash... Iucundi acti labores.
^ash... Honores mutant mores.
^ash... A dry sense of humour is better than slobbering everywhere.
^ash... Lottery: A tax on people who don't understand statistics.
^ash... Jesus is coming, look busy
^ash... Pulvis et umbra sumus.
^ash... Concordia parvae res crescunt, discordia maximae dilabuntur.
^ash... Ecce homo!
^ash... Dimidium facti qui coepit habet.
^ash... Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.
^ash... Epistula non erubescit.
^ash... When elephants fight it is the grass that suffers.
^ash... Mens agitat molem.
^ash... cup of tea, cup of tea, almost got shagged, cup of tea ...
^ash... The bold print giveth and the small print taketh away
^ash... But Englishmen detest a siesta.
^ash... Because they're obviously, definitely nuts!
^ash... In tropical climes there are certain times of day
^ash... All progress depends on the unreasonable
^ash... Let's call the calling off off.
^ash... Who gave them all these horses they ride upon?
^ash... Where did all these angels come from?
^ash... And all I know is I don't know what I know
^ash... Jumped, not pushed - aD 2001
^ash... Do or do not. There is no "try".
^ash... The days are just packed.
^ash... 42? 7 and a half million years and all you can come up with is 42?!
^ash... God is real, unless declared integer
^ash... Can leap speeding bullets in a single bound.
^ash... Faster than a tall building.
^ash... Another beer please - I'm sobering up here...
^ash... but probably quite unable to drink the coffee ...
^ash... Old hitchhikers never die-they just throw in the towel.
^ash... He's just zis guy you know?
^ash... "There's a frood who really knows where his towel is."
^ash... Windows 2000 - Built on New Technology Technology (joy)
^ash... The reverse side also has a reverse side.
^ash... Windows 2000 - Built on No Thanks Technology
^ash... "My Lord, I have a cunning plan."
^ash... Argument? No, this is Abuse. You want next door.
^ash... Welcome to Hell! Here's your copy of Windows.
^ash... In every generation, there is a Chosen One.
^ash... Willow: "Aren't ya sorta naturally buff, Buff?"
^ash... A German joke is no laughing matter. [MT]
^ash... Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
^ash... Is a castrated pig disgruntled?
^ash... If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?
^ash... If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
^ash... If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
^ash... If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
^ash... If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
^ash... How is it possible to have a civil war?
^ash... How do I set my laser printer on stun?
^ash... Resistance is fertile.
^ash... Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
^ash... A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
^ash... "Calm down. It's only ones and zeros."
^ash... Computers can never replace human stupidity
^ash... You can't make eight cats pull a sled through the snow.
^ash... JESUS SAVES, passes to Moses, he shoots. It's good! He scores!
^ash... We came, we saw, we kicked its ass.
^ash... and then I had to reboot a hundred times ...
^ash... Two rights don't make a wrong.
^ash... Experience: What you get when you don't get what you want
^ash... Friends don't let friends use Windows.
^ash... An enemy will agree, but a friend will argue.
^ash... You may never find love down a T1 line
^ash... Why is there so much month left at the end of the bandwidth?
^ash... People get ready - there's a train comin'
^ash... Heisenberg may have been here.
^ash... Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always.
^ash... I was going to picket them, but I didn't have any comfortable shoes.
^ash... Fasten your seatbelt - I want to try something.
^ash... The Germans wore grey, you wore blue.
^ash... The fundamental things apply as time goes by.
^ash... [<------------------------- width restriction ------------------------->]
^ash... Play it, Sam. Play _As_Time_Goes_By_
^ash... Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so.
^ash... The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.
^ash... You live and learn. At any rate, you live.
^ash... I love deadlines. I love the swooshing sound they make as they fly by
^ash... Someday we'll look back on this and plow into a parked car.
^ash... The one who walks in integrity walks securely. [Prov 10:9]
^ash... The world is a book, and those who do not travel, read only a page.
^ash... Eagles may soar, but weasels aren't sucked into jet engines.
^ash... The early bird catches the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
^ash... He who laughs last - didn't get the joke
^ash... Windows XP - an escape rather than a release
^ash... Never trust a child farther than you can throw it.
^ash... The elephant is a graceful bird.
^ash... America, home of the brave - until they slaughtered them all
^ash... We'll burn that bridge when we come to it
^ash... I wonder if God had breakfast before he created the world...
^ash... Never laugh at live dragons
^ash... If you were the only girl in the world, you'd have to have a strong back.
^ash... Beer /is/ the answer - we just can't remember the question.
^ash... Pizza and revolutionary politics - discuss
^ash... I might be drunk, but at least I'm not insane
^ash... You can make it illegal, but you can't make it unpopular.
^ash... Man is by nature a political animal.
^ash... Eloquence is logic on fire.
^ash... False eloquence is exaggeration; true eloquence is emphasis.
^ash... Eloquence is the poetry of prose.
^ash... Eloquence is a painting of the thoughts.
^ash... This message not to be used as a floatation device.
^ash... 'cal 9 1752' - you know you want to
^ash... A plucked goose doesn't lay golden eggs
^ash... /earth: device full
^ash... There's a pinch of the madman in every great man.
^ash... One good turn gets most of the blankets.
^ash... Gravity: It's not just a good idea, it's the LAW!
^ash... People who deal with bits should expect to get bitten.
^ash... How do I love thee? My accumulator overflows.
^ash... One man's constant is another man's variable.
^ash... If I save the whales, where do I keep them?
^ash... Eat right, exercise daily, live clean, die anyway.
^ash... It's all fun and games,'till someone loses an eye! Then it's a *SPORT*
^ash... You can't judge right from looking at the wrong
^ash... You can't judge a fish by looking in the pond
^ash... You can't judge a sister by looking at her brother
^ash... You can't judge a woman by looking at her man
^ash... You can't judge sugar by looking at the cane
^ash... You can't judge a daughter by looking at the mother
^ash... You can't judge honey by looking at the bee
^ash... You can't judge an apple by looking at a tree
^ash... You have new mail (see above)
^ash... Ignorance isn't bliss - after you've had it explained to you
^ash... Get the hell out of our Galaxy!
^ash... Warning: time of day goes back, taking countermeasures.
^ash... and these three fokkers were Messerschmitts
^ash... Learn as if you were to live forever.
^ash... Live as if you were to die tomorrow.
^ash... I never let schooling interfere with my education.
^ash... This message does enable user to fly.
^ash... You can't judge one by looking at the other
^ash... This message represents the official view of the voices in my head
^ash... Mary had a little lamb. The doctor was quite surprised.
^ash... Gates' Law: The speed of software halves every eighteen months
^ash... Save the whales - collect the whole set
^ash... Measure with a micrometer. Mark with chalk. Cut with an axe.
^ash... It's not easy being green
^ash... All I want is a proper cup of coffee, made in a proper copper coffee pot
^ash... You can't judge a book by looking at the cover
^ash... You're unique - just like everyone else
^ash... I'd rather have a bottle in front of me...
^ash... it is because giants were standing on my shoulders
^ash... Some do, some don't
^ash... The universe will not co-operate in a cover-up
^ash... I have learned to use the word "impossible" with the greatest caution.
^ash... Think bigger - you can't cross a chasm in two jumps.
^ash... You can call it a wizard once it can do bloody magic!
^ash... When it is incorrect, it is, at least *authoritatively* incorrect. (h2g2)
^ash... The medium is the massage
^ash... The medium is the message
^ash... You're not drunk if you can lie flat on the floor without holding on
^ash... Life would be easier if we had source code.
^ash... Life will be easier once we have the source code.
^ash... You can only throw as far as someone can catch
^ash... "Go away or I will replace you with a very small shell script."
^ash... If Bill Gates had a dime for every time a Windows box crashed...
^ash... Computers do not solve problems, they execute solutions.
^ash... unzip; strip; touch; finger; mount; fsck; gasp; more; yes; umount; sleep
^ash... If she doesn't scare ya, no evil thing will...
^ash... To err is human; to really screw things up requires the root password.
^ash... Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers.
^ash... This message may contain nuts.
^ash... There is more to life than increasing its speed.
^ash... I'm gonna live forever, or die trying.
^ash... An eye for an eye will leave the whole world blind.
^ash... We must become the change we want to see.
^ash... Beer isn't the answer. Beer is the question. 'Yes' is the answer.
^ash... If they give you lined paper, write the other way.
^ash... Only a dullard is brilliant at breakfast.
^ash... Another visitor, stay a while, staaaaaay FOREVER!
^ash... Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?
^ash... URIs don't change - people change them [http://w3.org/Provider/Style/URI]
^ash... Bright and Early - choose one
^ash... OK, I'm weird, but I'm saving up to be eccentric.
^ash... Bind, so good they rewrote it twice
^ash... "Oh, bother" said Pooh as the multiverse imploded
^ash... Save the Earth - there are four to collect
^ash... Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder
^ash... This message has been cruelly tested on cute little furry animals.
^ash... Write once, debug everywhere
^ash... I'm not as thunk as you drink I am
^ash... Alcohol - it's in the blood
^ash... Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.
^ash... One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
^ash... Support your right to bare arms! Wear short sleeves
^ash... Americans reserve the right to arm bears.
^ash... Destroy him, my robots!
^ash... We're not at home to Mr. Cockup
^ash... Je suis Marxiste, tendance Groucho
^Dave... A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
^Dave... If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
^Dave... Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
^Dave... I intend to live forever - so far, so good.
^Dave... Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
^Dave... When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
^Dave... Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
^Dave... Gravity is a myth, the earth sucks!
^Dave... Black holes are where God divided by zero.
^Dave... ==/==/==/== Police Tagline ==/== Do Not Cross ==/==/==/==
^Dave... 128000 bytes found in 32 lost chains. Convert to taglines (Y/N)?
^Dave... This is not a tagline. It's just highly coincidential line noise.
^Dave... I don't have any solution, but I certainly admire the problem.
^Dave... Eschew Obfuscation
^Dave... When policy fails try thinking.
^Dave... Fasten your seatbelt, I wanna try something.
^Dave... Vidi, Vici, Veni: I saw, I conquered, I came.
^Dave... Veni, Vidi, Deja Vu: I came, I saw, I'd been there before.
^Dave... Veni, Vidi, Velcro: I came, I saw, I stuck around.
^Dave... Veni, Vidi, Visa: I came, I saw, I shopped.
^Dave... Veni, Vidi, Fetuccini: I came, I saw, I had lunch.
^Dave... Quantum particles: The dreams that stuff is made of.
^Dave... Never kiss anything that doesn't have lips
^Dave... Never judge a man by his taglines.
^Dave... Never feed your cat anything that clashes with the carpet
^Dave... Never anger a dragon, for thou art crunchy and good tasting
^Dave... Your password is pitifully obvious.
^Dave... Multitasking: Screwing up several things at once...
^Dave... Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.
^Dave... A dry sense of humor is better than slobbering everywhere.
^Dave... Avoid temporary variables and strange women.
^Dave... AI: Making computers behave like they do in the movies.
^Dave... A bug in the code is worth two in the documentation.
^Dave... Due to budget cuts the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
^Dave... Simon says stand up! Simon says sit down! Format drive C:! Ha! Gotcha!
^Dave... I'm out of bed and dressed, what more do you want?
^Dave... I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
^Dave... Jesus is coming, look busy.
^Dave... Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...
^Dave... Answers: $1, Short: $5, Correct: $25, dumb looks are still free
^Dave... (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)nfluence with large hammer
^Dave... Blessed are the pessimists, for they make the backups!
^Dave... Windows is a colorful clown suit for DOS.
^Dave... "Monopoly? No, we just don't want competition."
^Dave... Experience: What you get when you don't get what you want.
^Dave... A cynic smells the flowers and looks for the coffin.
^Dave... Windows: a virus with mouse support.
^Dave... Optimist: Someone who doesn't know all the facts yet.
^Dave... Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
^Dave... THE GOLDEN RULE: He who has the gold makes the rules.
^Dave... Winners don't use Windows.
^Dave... On the other hand, you have different fingers.
^Dave... Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
^Dave... There ain't no party like an IC party.
^Dave... Special Brew: Central heating for tramps.
^Dave... Every silver lining has a cloud.
^Dave... Why be difficult, when with a bit of effort, you can be impossible.
^Dave... Gravity - It's not just a good idea, it's the LAW!
^Dave... Vegetarian: Indian word for lousy hunter.
^Dave... Overweight is when you step on your dog's tail, and it dies.
^Dave... Windows XP. An escape rather than a release.
^Dave... Whatever doesn't kill me can still bloody hurt.
^Dave... I'm pink therefore I'm spam.
^Dave... Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
^Dave... There's a lot to be said for breathing.
^Dave... A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
^Dave... 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
^Dave... For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
^Dave... Ghandi would have smacked you in the head.
^Dave... He who laughs last, didn't get the joke.
^Dave... If I want your opinion, I'll beat it from you.
^Dave... You can't have everything... where would you put it?
^Dave... Irony: God gave the tortoise a drag factor of 0.03.
^Dave... Never accept beer from a urologist.
^Dave... "Oh, bother!" said Pooh as Piglet fell in the mincer.
^Dave... Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
^Dave... Diplomacy is saying "nice doggy" until you find a rock.
^Dave... Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
^Dave... Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?
^Dave... Pardon my driving, I am reloading.
^Dave... I wonder how much deeper would the ocean be without sponges.
^Dave... He's not dead, He's electroencephalographically challenged.
^Dave... I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
^Dave... Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
^Dave... Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
^Dave... I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
^Dave... Poker rules supplement: A .44 Magnum beats 4 aces.
^Dave... Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
^Dave... It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
^Dave... Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes all the way to the bone.
^Dave... If you think sex is a pain in the arse, try a different position.
^Dave... Drink is the answer.... I don't remember the question.
^Dave... You'll never be half the man your mother was.
^Dave... You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
^Dave... Think bigger -- you can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
^Dave... As long as the answer is right, who cares if the question is wrong?
^Dave... Remember you are unique. Just like everyone else.
^Dave... All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.
^Dave... All I ask is for a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
^Dave... A.A.A.A : Organization for drunks who drive.
^Dave... A day without sunshine is like night.
^Dave... "Eat shit mother!" said Pooh rebelliously.
^Dave... "Ngggh!" said Pooh as Eeyore's legs buckled.
^Dave... Children: Most common sexually transmitted disease.
^Dave... If your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt.
^Dave... Mary had a little lamb. The doctor was quite surprised.
^Dave... The cat sat on -- well let's not go into that right now...
^Dave... "Bother!" said Pooh as the needle missed the vein.
^Dave... This product has been cruelly tested on cute little fury animals.
^Dave... A closed mouth gathers no foot.
^Dave... 100,000 lemmings can't be wrong.
^Dave... If at first you don't succeed, sky-diving isn't for you.
^Dave... Smile! It makes people wonder what you're up to...
^Dave... Did you ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
^Dave... When you choke a Smurf, what colour does it turn?
^Dave... Love thy neighbour, but don't get caught.
^Dave... Several excuses are always less convincing than one.
^Dave... Disneyland: Trap operated by a mouse.
^Dave... Those who live by the sword get shot by those that don't.
^Dave... You can in a Nissan, but it's harder in a Lada.
^Dave... "My homework ate my dog." - Genetics student.
^Dave... Two's company, but three's BRILLIANT!
^Dave... It's easier to get forgiveness than permission.
^Dave... Two wrongs don't make a right, but 4 wrongs to the power of -1...
^Dave... Nuke the gay baby whales for Jesus.
^Dave... Sleep: Inadequate substitute from caffeine.
^Dave... When in doubt, mumble. When in trouble, delegate.
^Dave... Every picture tells a lie.
^Dave... Reality: A disease caused by alcohol deficiency.
^Dave... Forecast for tonight: Dark.
^Dave... "Anyone can make a mistake!" - Dalek climbing off a dustbin.
^Dave... It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it.
^Dave... Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
^Dave... Never eat a hedgehog without peeling it first.
^Dave... All that glitters is not Gary.
^Dave... If all goes well, you've overlooked something.
^Dave... No Scotty! Don't beam me up, I'm going for a s...h....i....
^Dave... I don't have a drink problem. I drink, I get drunk, I fall over. No problem.
^Dave... All that glitters has a high refractive index.
^Dave... We'd all like to vote for the best man but he's never a candidate.
^Dave... The early worm gets the bird.